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I barely moved, heart beating in my throat. That same wind caught the window, still hanging open. The hinges sounded again, that familiar sound echoin... back strangely from my dreams, and it broke me from the spell. I beckoned to him. He stood slowly, like a beast with its eyes trained on a hunter. I held my breast through my gown with a hand and shifted beneath the blankets, so the fabric dipped between my spread thighs. Still afraid to speak, wary that a sound might send him scurrying, I. ? Why?? I hadn't a clue.? I did know, however, that for me it was abasic need, one I'd attempted to regularly satisfy since I'd been in my teens. ?? At first she'd balked, explaining that sheloved me and couldn't possibly hurt me.?After a short while, though, and after a number of heart-to-heart talks,she'd come to understand how important genitorture was to me and she'd agreedto try it.? Once she got started, shebegan to enjoy the role of the tormentress and before long was initiating. .My boyfriend was drafted and sent off to Viet Nam..I was devastated.. Would I ever see him again?Many days and nights were spent thinking about that afternoon, the afternoon of lovemaking and lust...My loneliness grew and masturbation was just placating me, but I needed to touch another and be touched.I had not heard from my boyfriend in months and so I moved on...I wanted to give another blow job.. a really good blow job..I had met other men, but I was not interested in any of themThey did. When a doctor just tells you to make the best of it and live as full a life as you can.Looking back now, I’m deeply ashamed of how I felt. We were talking about a new life and a young girl who was scared and needed my love and support. But I want to be honest with you. I felt like the terminal illness guy. Mentally picturing the implosion of my twenty-year marriage, like one of those jerry cans that crushes in as the air is sucked out. Crushed by the atmospheric pressure. Crushed by the.
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